My Children, the Locusts

The downside to taking my children to other people's  houses is that most people without small children don't find it necessary to hide all of their edibles. Either that, or they think I'm exaggerating when I talk about the amount that my boys eat. I wish I were; it would save me a fortune in groceries. However, one child is a toddler whose definition of "food" is very loose, and the other is a 3-year-old Hoover. My children take horrible advantage of food left unattended whenever we go visiting. Today they descended upon the fruit basket at my neighbor's and would have happily swallowed clementines whole had I not stopped them-instead, our talk was punctuated by small voices saying "you OPEN DIS!!" (this is how they ask you to peel a fruit). I was met with great fury when I finally stopped the massacre for fear a child would explode. Not fifteen minutes later, Canaan demanded to go downstairs-"I watch Story Train and you START IN THE KITCHEN, MOMMY! I need dinner!" One would think I never fed them.